Scotticus Finch: BREAKING NEWS! SCOTTICUSFINCH EXCLUSIVE!

October 9, 2009

BREAKING NEWS! SCOTTICUSFINCH EXCLUSIVE!

ScotticusFinch has received reliable information indicating that later today Barack Obama will be announced as the winner of the Cannes Film Festival's Palme d'Or for his VHS film "~~Bears @ Browns~~ Sasha's Swim Meet".

Developing...

UPDATE: According to exclusive ScotticusFinch information, this afternoon President Barack Obama will hold a press conference accepting this year's Fields Medal for his work in calculating an exact 15% tip on a $109 dinner bill split two ways.

Developing...

UPDATE: Insiders have confirmed to ScotticusFinch that yesterday Barack Obama was unanimously named "World's Best Grandma" by the Association for Research on Mothering. White House spokesman Robert Gibbs describes Obama as "glib".

Developing...

4 comments:

JennyOctober 09, 2009 9:43 AM
Are you insinuating he doesn't deserve some of these awards? Blasphemy! Clearly, his victory has proven the age-old adage, "It's the thought that counts." Because clearly, actions had nothing to do with it.
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JennyOctober 09, 2009 9:44 AM
And clearly, I like to use the word "clearly".

Clearly.
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ScotticusOctober 09, 2009 9:51 AM
I actually saw "Sasha's Swim Meet". I did not care for it. Did not care for it at all.

It insists upon itself.
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JaredOctober 10, 2009 8:33 AM
"A commentator on Britain’s Sky News captured the mood well when he said it appeared Obama had won the prize for 'not being George Bush'.”
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